Man : “So what do you think of the new pastor? I tell you, he’s way better than that last one. This one is more humane.”

Man : “Can I use this DVD player to make phone calls?”

Clerk (making face like someone just farted): Oh, good lord.

Woman : “Do you think anyone has ever called breasts chesticles?”

Later: Well I’ll be damned. People have. I must be living under a rock.

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